Scenario 12 — Parent unsure how to respond to teen

Situation (full narrative)

Marcus is worried about his sixteen-year-old son, Ethan.

Over the past few weeks, Ethan has been quieter than usual. He has been spending more time in his room, answering questions with short responses, and staying up later on his phone. Marcus recently found out that Ethan has missed two assignments at school and has been avoiding a conversation about it.

Marcus wants to respond well, but he feels torn. Part of him wants to confront Ethan firmly and take the phone away immediately. Another part of him worries that if he pushes too hard, Ethan will shut down even more. He also feels guilty because work has been demanding lately, and he wonders if he has been too distracted as a father.

Marcus is not sure what is actually needed. Is this rebellion? Is Ethan discouraged? Is Marcus reacting out of fear? Does he need to act now, wait, ask better questions, or set a clear boundary?

He wants to pray before responding, but his prayer keeps getting tangled up in fear, guilt, and urgency.

Training exercise

• Separate the situation into facts, interpretations, and emotions.
• List what is actually known about Ethan’s behavior.
• List what Marcus may be assuming or reading into the situation.
• Name the emotions that are adding pressure to Marcus’s response.
• Identify the clearest issue that needs prayer right now.
• Consider what pressure Marcus feels to act quickly.
• Choose one Authority card that helps Marcus begin with God rather than panic.
• Choose one Identity card that helps Marcus pray as a faithful steward rather than a fearful controller.
• Choose one Situation card that best names the parenting pressure.
• Choose one Discernment card that slows the situation down in a helpful way.
• State the prayer focus in one clear sentence without trying to solve the parenting issue yet.